When they say...

God will not give you more than you can handle, He sure must think we can handle A LOT! 

Hubby went to the hospital this week with chest pains. I was an hour away with my mother so I got a text from him saying 

"Hows it going. Don't freak out." 

"Going well. Why don't freak out?"

"I am at (the hospital)"

"ok. Why? Are you ok?"

"I think I had some chest pains"

I asked if they were doing tests and he said yes. Mom and I head back home, really not thinking the worst. Or rather trying not to. He had gone to the hospital with pains before only to have it be anxiety. 

We pull into the parking lot of the hospital when hubby calls and says...

"You need to meet me at (another hospital 15 min away) they say I need emergency surgery" 

"What!!!! Emergency surgery?"

"Yeah, they are taking me in an ambulance. Its the thing my dad has. "

His dad has a hereditary heart defect. He had a stint put in years ago. His grandfather with  the same defect died on the operating table.

I try to ask a question and he says... "Oh, they say I am bleeding into my chest." 

He is very nonchalant through all of this, although at that point I can hear fear in his voice. 

We find out where we need to go and I start flying. I don't think my mother has heard me say as many swear words cussing people out for cutting me off or not letting me in as I try to get to the hospital during rush hour traffic before he dies. I fly to security who rushes me up to surgery while mom stays to wait for the boys. We made it up right before he goes in and I cuss him out. I tell him he promised me forever so he owes me. I think I called him an asshole. I honestly don't remember too much about that except I said f*#& and other things, with the nurses watching me. They take him prep and the doctor gives me the details. 

Aortic Root Dissection

This is one of two ways that kills people "naturally" If he had waited any longer before he drove himself to the hospital he would have died. There was a 25% chance of death during surgery, he could lose a leg, brain function, organ failure etc etc. 

Somehow I manage to get to the waiting area without losing it. The boys were not there yet. I was alone. I called the two people who I knew would get the word out. My MIL and our best friend. The boys finally arrive and I lose control. The next 6 hours friends and family arrive to a total of almost 15 people. The word is put out for prayers from everyone we can think of. My phone is blowing up constantly and I pace the aisle. The nurse calls every two hours to give me an update and as soon as she does a crowd gathers around me to listen. 

I don't know what I would have done without them. They were a massive support system on the absolute worst day of my life. I don't know how I would have survived without them. 

The nurse called about 8pm (4 hours in) to tell us he came through and they would be closing him up soon. It was another hour before she called to say they were closing him up and another hour before the doctor came out to talk to me. I am sure he was a bit surprised when everyone sat down to listen. A circle of 10 at that point all anxious to hear how he was. Fortunately our best friend and Js girlfriend both asked questions while all I cared about was when I could see him.

Surprisingly they let the family all come in. He was intubated and not awake, but he was ALIVE! 

I tried to stay with him but they would not let me. They expected me to go home and sleep. It was after midnight at that point and of course sleep was not going to happen. But I relented and went home where I laid on the couch and  attempted to sleep. Yeah No

We get to the hospital before visiting hours where I had to throw a fit to get to go up and wait to see him. I finally got the call that I could see him, he was awake. 

I don't think I have ever been more overjoyed to see my husband all covered in wires and tubes and still intubated as that moment. He reached for my hand and wrote "Do I look Cool?" with is finger. I think that will go down as one of my best memories ever. 

I am the most blessed and grateful person on the face of the Earth. The recovery time ahead is huge. But I don't care. He is Alive! I will take it all. All of the difficult times ahead are worth me being able to wake up next to him every day and tell him I love him. 

Why yes you do look cool.